Something...

It was one ordinary day but I felt extraordinary. The weather is a blazing 36 but inspite of the heat, I feel fine.I don't know what brought about the change. Maybe it is because of the long rest or its just hormones. Whatever it is, it made me feel light and happy.
I think that something good is coming along. Perhaps a new love or tons of money, or a career opportunity. I don't know yet but somehow just the thought of something good coming my way is enough to shake the gloom surrounding me in the past few days. A few days ago, I had another bout of my periodic depression characterized by self pity, anger, and envy. But now, I could not care less. All I'm looking forward to is that something. That something that I am still not aware of up to this moment.
Well, I'm sounding like a freak now. I just hope that even if that something does not come, I can get away with the depression. I wish I'll be contented with this unexplainable hope I am feeling for great things to come. The feeling of being happy even without certainty is a blessing in itself and I will try to treasure this as long as I can. =)

summer get-aways

when summer came this year, i never thought that I would be this busy. Last time, I was complaining about my friends not asking me out when they have things to do. But now, my hands are so full that I am choosing to retreat inside my bedroom and pretend I am sick.
Last April 25, if I am not mistaken, I was in Zambales with the gays. The get away was a blast. I never thought that we could party that like that. The Alowangin cove was breathtaking even if the waves are frightening.
The next day, I flew to Dipolog ans was almost left by the plane. My flight is 10:00 and I arrived at the airport at 9:15. Talk about saved by the bell; barely-saved. I spent a whole week in Mindanao and was given a chance to don the beaches of Dakak and Misamis Oriental. I went home looking like a lechon, my skin is reddish brown but the memories in myheart are priceless. I met wonderful people who taught me a few things. I am older than they are but their experiences are much more richer and because of them, I am vowing to expand my horizons, gain more belief in myself and do something about my dreams. I met new people, who in a very short span of time, I can call my friends.
A week after that Mindanao trip, I went partying with my friends and saw, my long time crush once again. hmmm... I wonder if there will ever be a love story out of this. But as Joan said, we are the century loveteam. Meaning - isang century na, hanggang tuksuhan pa rin. hehehe
I partied again after two years at DJ's booth and I discovered that I have changed a lot. I don't go to a place and hope that I will be able to flirt with the cutest guy around. I went there to enjoy myself, and I did. But I have to get home when the sun comes out because sunlight without sleep can make me feel reaaaaalllllllll ugggglllllyyyy!!!!!
Then came Marsha's first birthday, which was of course a success. The gays came and we had fun. Other relatives and friends attended and our efforts weren't wasted.
Last week, I was in Baguio. It was a trip I never thought I would enjoy because my boss is there and my co-teachers are not the extreme types. I was surprised that I had fun. I went to places I've never been to and took pictures which I will treasure forever.
Now with all these get aways, I can say that I still am loved. I still have friends. I thought when Ted passed away, my social life will be burnt with him. Now, at least I know that even if Ted the best(est) friend I could ever have, he left me with friends who can take care of me the way he did when he was still alive. =)