Welcome 2011!

The fireworks are over. It's now eerily quiet in the house. Even the roads outside are making no sounds. As I've mentioned earlier, 2010 has been a good year. Though I encountered a lot of frustrations and confusions - most of the memories are generally good. So now, I am writing a letter for the year that came.

Dear 2011,

I am welcoming you with a smile. I am hopeful that you will be more fruitful than the past year. In 9 months you are going to make me older and I hope, wiser as well. I don't have plans for you yet. But I do have resolutions because as you know, I'm a resolution freak. When I was much younger, I didn't imagine what you would be like. Now, I still have no idea but I am hopeful that you will be really good to me.

I have listed down my resolutions in my earlier blog entry. Perhaps I will write it down in another piece of paper so that I would always be reminded of the things that I promised I would do. It's your first day and I haven't slept yet. But technically, the 9pm sleeping time will take effect later right?

I have to push myself harder this time. I need to have that determination and will to make my wishes true. Without further ado,

Wecome 2011!

Cheers!

Last Day

This is the last day of 2010. The last day of staying up till the morning, eating junk, and wasting money. I am currently listening to the Morning Rush and the top ten topic is letter for 2010 or for someone from 2010. The other day, I saw the RoRo reax asking what for them is the highlight of 2010. Now, on December 31, 2010 - I am trying to review the year but so many things happened and they all happened so fast.

There were depressing moments. When I try to remember what upset me, I can't even recall them anymore. There were a lot of happy moments - moving in to our new place, Adie's first steps, RX moments with Chez, new cyber friends, malling with friends, meeting up with Jingle and a lot more.

The high school reunion, my first time in a gay bar, party peeps party, Adie shouting at me, being accepted at essays, the interview with the singaporeans, hanging out at lea's place, staying up with gladys, beauty sessions with analynn. Hay! ang dami talaga.

Later, I will say goodbye to 2010. The happiness I am feeling just trying to count all those wonderful moments will make me welcome 2011 with more longing, love, and hope.

Resolutions Again and I Love it!

The year is about to end. Here I am, savoring the few days left of my vacation. I haven't slept normally for about two months now and I guess the best resolution for 2011 is to sleep like normal people. I mean it wouldn't hurt to sleep at 8 pm and be more productive the whole day.

I have posted on my fb wall that I wouldn't change just because it's new year. Well, the fact is I am a resolution freak. I love making new year's resolutions which yearly, I fail to carry out. I always proise myself that this year it would be different. Then again, it's me who's talking.

However, this doesn't stop me from making more resolutions. I even have my quarterly and midyear resolutions. As usual I can't carry them out but I guess that's how my life is. I love making promises to change some things about my lifestyle because this gives me something to look forward to. Just dreaming of how better my life would be if I were more disciplined is enough to make me try.

So as early as now I am preparing my list and here are some of them:

1. I will sleep at 9 pm (because I come home @ 8)
2. I will eat less at night
3. I will jog/walk at least three times weekly
4. I will do more writing
5. I will be more patient with my students
6. I will see good things in other people
7. I will smile more
8. I will give my best in everything I do
9. I will save money
10. I will go to church more

I am excited already! I have three days to eat everything I want and sleep anytime I want and I will make the most of it. Next time, I will tell you about my plans. =)

Noche Buena

It's my favorite part of Christmas as a grown up - the noche buena.

This is the time when my mom prepares food that we can hardly consume. Every year, we plan on lessening our dishes. However, every year - it's still too much. That's okay though because it means we'll have more food for the next day.

This is also the time when we exchange gifts. But due to the crisis, not all of us have gifts for each other this year. Well, it's alright. Our family is complete. Baby Adie is one year and three months old and there is a man who is brave enough to be his father.

What makes this year Noche Buena special is that we held it in our own place!

This is the first time that only us, our immediate family is here. We are not living in our relative's house and no one dictated us on what to cook and not to cook.

Don't get me wrong. I love my relatives - I do. It's just that this is the only real time that we are free of them. It's nice to be away from them once in a while because it makes us miss them. We don't feel so pressured and suffocated with their demands and dictates.It also makes us feel free.

It would have been doubly fun if my dad were still alive. He always looks forward to this night. Yes, I still miss him specially on occasions like this.

Lack of Sleep

I don't think this is insomnia.

It's just a stupid sleeping pattern all haywire from my lack of discipline.

It's almost 5 a.m. and I'm still awake. I hate the heaviness I feel when I wake up at half past noon. Yet, I can't will myself to sleep at 8 pm. It's almost Christmas. I haven't wrapped my gifts yet. I stay up all night surfing the net and reading books - things I could do later or some other time. Yes, I am undisciplined and I am beginning to hate myself for it.

I know what my problem is as you can see. However, I am not doing the necessary steps to solve it. I blame the net for being open for 24 hours. I blame the pirated DVD's I could easily buy off the streets. I blame everything else except me.

I am acting like a child. Eversince, this has been my problem. I remember staying up until the national anthem plays on the local TV station when I was around five or six. I would mess up our room until I get tired. My mom even told me that I stayed up for two straight days until I passed out.

This is getting out of hand. I hate the feeling I get in the morning everytime I stay up until the wee hours of the morning. The feeling that life passed me by.

Holiday Blues

The Christmas season is the busiest time of the year in this country. As early as September, people are already preparing for that one grand day. I'm a Catholic and I'm a believer. I love celebrating the birth of Jesus Christ. I share, I party, I shop.

It's just that lately, I am getting tired. Maybe it's because of the age. I just can't stand the number of people in the malls and tiangges. A lot of times I find myself computing how much I need to spend just to buy all those gifts. In parties, I don't enjoy alcohol that much. I am not very interested in conversation as well. I enjoyed getting together with some high school classmates and singing with my fellow teachers but after the affair, I can't seem to remember why I was so happy in the first place.

I can't say I'm lonely. I have my family to keep me up and about. Maybe I'm just bored and getting out with friends is not the thing that I want to do right now.

I almost forgot, it's my Dad's birthday today. Happy birthday Dad!

Anyway, I have been sleeping at six in the morning and waking up at three in the afternoon. I always get that feeling that life had passed me by when I wake up. Maybe I should start with forcing myself to sleep earlier.

Tomorrow I could try that; but now, I think I'll stay up late and do some more writing.

Confused (Again!)

Period is over. Now it's time to look forward.

Tomorrow is Monday once more. I want to see the kids. I'm excited to practice our dance for the Christmas program and tell them the story of the first Christmas. Well I just hope that tomorrow they will be more attentive and "behaved" than the last week.

I'm still having dilemmas about what I should do next. I don't want to resign from my job just because I already told everyone of my plans. The thing is, I have nowhere to go right now. My hopes of getting that Singapore job are dim. I want to enroll next year but if I resign, where in the world will I get my tuition?

I want to have a heart to heart talk with my boss. Maybe she can help me decide. I had the talk with my family and all they told me is to do what I think is best. But I don't know what is best. I am confused.

Jitters

Once more, I am trying my hand at writing.

Yes! Writing as in the article type like the ones I used to do for our high school paper and the ones I wanted to write before college turned me into a jaded realist. Not the ones I am writing now, you know, the diary/emotional type of writing that I've been doing lately. I am not even sure if my grammar is as good as it was before but I am trying. I am going back to the thing that I wanted to do before life's successive bites pushed me into teaching.

After yesterday's rants about giving up the academe - I realized that my problem is not about losing my passion for educating kids. I still want to teach kids. I am just exhausted from all the pressures and just like my students who are facing bits of failure, I am getting frustrated. I am not quitting. I have chosen this vocation so I am sticking with it. But while I am still frustrated and exhausted, I think that going back to my first love will not jeopardize my teaching. I am just finding an outlet so that I can regain the enthusiasm I used to have in my "real" job.

So anyway, inasmuchas I am excited to do real writing again, I am very nervous. I look at the writing assignments available but old fears are setting in. What if I do a lousy job? What if I write junk? What if the editors and senior writers laugh at my work?

I decided that since I am all jittery now, I would not take assignments yet. I will just wait a while, take a breather until I put myself together and be able to take in all the changes brought about by recent events.

And when I do get rid of all these jitters, I would be able to convince myself that I am indeed a writer. =)

This Time I'm the Boss II

I am still not feeling so good.

I am not mad. Just a little cranky maybe. But not angry. It's just that I feel like I did my job well inspite of my endless rants about changing my profession and wanting to be kid-free for a while. I have my imprfections. I shout at my kids, I punish them if necessary but I love them. I hate to admit this but I do love my students. I don't want to lose any of them. I can't just let one of them go without being able to tell myself that I did everything I could to teach them what they need to learn.

My techniques and classroom management techniques are far from perfect. However, each day, I try to hone my craft even if I am feeling the boredom and stagnation. I have been in the same place for 5 years and 3 months now. I can't feel that I am moving forward and most of the time I feel like I am wasting my UP education here.

Everyone needs to grow. I want to change fields after this school year to give myself time to do just that. But can't they at least wait until March before they take this kid away from me? Am I that bad that they want to do this now?

Anyway, I can't do anything about their decision. It's their kid, not mine. I understand that they want the best for him. I guess I am not as good as I want myself to be.

It's just that there are things that I need to consider when I implement discipline in my classroom. These are preschool kids and this is a critical period in a human being's life. I am very careful not to traumatize any of them. I also have to consider the parents' feelings when I enforce my class rules. I am just so afraid to ruffle feathers that in the end - it is my students who suffers the most. And I can't let that happen.

So I guess I won't back out now.

I really would give my profession a thought. I can't live with the pressure anymore. Sometimes, I even dream of things happening in the classroom. I am stressed and I need a break. A hiatus from all this hoola.

This Time I'm the Boss

I am not feeling so good right now.

I have a feeling that one of the parents will pull out her child from school. Part of me is sad because I have become attached to the kid. A part of me is relieved because I will have one less student to think about. And I am a bit nervous because I am not sure if I am the reason for the mother's sudden loss of interest in our school.

Lately, my methods were not as ideal as I want them to be. I easily flare up and my patience is shorter than my eyelashes. I have concentrated on academic development that I forgot to consider the children's socio-emotional aspects. I am taking full responsibility. It's my fault. I have made my mistakes. I will apologize to the parent and get on with my life.

I will stop trying this time. I will stop trying to please the parents and my superior. I will just do this job. Execute the lessons and discipline the kids my own way.

I am tired of explaining myself to everyone. I am tired of working to gain their approval. I am tired of competing for attention.

This time, I will do things my way and if they don't like it - so be it!

Realization

Midlife crisis - defined as a period of self doubt experienced by some individuals with the realization that youth has passed them by. I am nowhere near middle age. I still have some good eight years before I declare myself as one. However, I am beginning to feel that self doubt.

I know I still have a lot of time but I feel like I have wasted my twenties. It should've been the time to explore possibilities in my career and in my personal growth. Instead, I have used it being fearful of what the future might bring.

Now, I want to be ready to get out of my comfort zone. I want to do the exploration that I should've done years ago. Fear has driven me to places that are both good and bad. My family is now doing better. My sisters are now grown up. I have a nephew to raise with my whole family. My mom is not as overworked as before. I have reached the highest position in school.

I still want more things though. I want to pursue my dream of writing fiction. I want to finish my MA. I want to go abroad and earn more. I'm dreaming of buying my family a house and owning my school.

I can still do them I know but my opportunities are getting slimmer every day. When I look at job opportunities, they are looking for someone younger than I am. When I try to write, I feel like I'm writing gibberish. I always tell myself that I should take baby steps towards getting over these fears - but it's just so hard!

Is there a store somewhere where I can buy courage? Or faith so strong that will make me believe that nothing is impossible? Well, I have found my own answer just now. All I need is to pray.

I am not a very religious person and everyday I am struggling to keep my faith. I am not as strong as people believe me to be. Oh Lord, I find answers in strange places and strange circumstances.

Keeping the Faith

After almost ten years of not showing up, she came back - Noreen. 1/12th of our so called barkada in high school.

I have been looking for her for so many years. Nobody knew what happened to her except she went back home to Ilocos. I searched the internet for any signs. I even looked up her older brother but to no avail. Now, she found us. She came to us.

It was the right time.

Now that I am losing touch of my remaining friends and I am planning on working abroad. Her comeback made me feel that things happen just at the right moment.

I have stayed in my school for almost six years now. As I wrote earlier, I am so used to it I could do it with my eyes closed. Out of boredom, I searched the internet and the opportunity for Singapore came. I have always been afraid of change. My best friend told me the other day that she thinks I am going to stay in one place forever. Now, I am ready to face a new world. I'm still scared but I am choosing to have faith.

Faith in my Creator. Faith that He knows what is the best for me. Faith that He will not give me a challenge I could not take.

I want to hold on to that faith.

I was talking to my mother the other day about how some mothers are afraid of bad things happening to their children when they go away. She told me that she has the same fears but she shakes it off with a little prayer. My mother is not a religious woman and she rarely discuss God with us. But those words came at the right time.

I have a lot of fears. Fears that I am afraid to face. Because I am deciding to count on faith - I will not face them at all. I will hold on God's hands and ask Him to face it for me. Knowing that He will not let me down is enough to make those fears go away, leave, and not come back.

The Pause

Right now, I am enjoying a quiet moment.

It is a weekend and I'm sure all my friends are out. I know that they are somewhere drinking, dancing, or singing. They are rewarding themselves with fun after the gruelling five days of deadlines, cranky bosses, irritating clients, etc.

But right now, I am sitting alone in our dining area and blogging.

I know I am missing a lot - the fun, the scoops, the companionship. I'm alright though, I haven't been with them for a while. I just want to enjoy myself tonight. It's "me" time.

It is not easy to find contentment these days. With the changing standards and fast-paced life, it is hard to stay in one place and watch everything pass you by. It is always tempting to go with the flow. Today, I tried stopping and it felt nice. It's like sitting in front of the street and watching people go by. It is quite relaxing and amazingly, it made me feel good.

Soon, I know I have to stand up and go back to my to the hustle and bustle. But I'm not dreading it. I am actually excited because I have a lot of ideas in my head. Ideas that formed because I stopped and watched. And I know, if ever I feel tired or pressured again - I can opt to stop and once more, watch.

letting go

I was looking at the pictures of some batchmates who had their own reunion. We were not invited, not even informed, because it was just their "section."

I try to be unaffected. After all, I understand where they were coming from. Sometimes, it's much nicer to be around people who are closer to you. After all, back in high school, they spent more time with each other than with the whole batch. Together with our "sections," we have experienced similar events and shared the same environment. We are closer within the confines of the classroom than with the people who graduated in the same year as us.

However, it made me realize one thing. It was a hopeless pursuit to persuade batch 95 to be together in one grand reunion. Cliques will find their way to have private moments with each other. Old friends would prefer to be together and ignore others in the room who are also busy catching up with their old pals.

I guess, it was naive of me to believe that I can still make new friends out of old acquaintances. I am making a pathetic effort to replace my own so-called friends in HS.

Ted is in some place better. I am left with Ana Lynn and Gladys. Leah is making a comeback but she is based in Singapore. Noreen disappeared without a trace. Enrico, Grace, Arlene, Nita, and Me-anne forgot about us. Jeunesse is just around the corner. It is just so sad that after all we went through together, only a few of us are left.

I cannot blame my batchmates if they don't want to respond to my calls or comment in the FB stats. We were not close in HS, we didn't share the same memories. We were mean in an innocent way. If it's any consolation, we don't want them to feel inferior. We only did our best for ourselves. Academics were our world back then. We were sheltered from the pain of poverty, abuse, and ignorance. All we cared about is getting high grades and making sure our parents will be on stage on our graduation day. We didn't mean to make you feel that way.

We are not aware of the realities in life. Teenage pregnancy, drug addiction, and the likes were like fiction to us. We knew how it was like to run out of money but we were not aware that others in our batch had to sell their bodies or work just to feed their families. We had our crushes but having sex was like a crime even engaging in a serious relationship for that matter. We do not cut classes or hurt other people because we are having fun just being us. Kids! Kids who like malling, dressing up, and impressing our parents.

Reality bit us in the neck after graduation!

Not all of us are successful. Not all of us are living a charmed life. That is why we are trying to reach out. IAM TRYING TO REACH OUT.

But I guess it's too late. We are too old and life has hardened most of us. I am letting my dream of having a grand reunion go. I guess I'll focus on finding my own "section" because that is where I belong.

Back on Track

Sembreak is over and I'm back with my kids. I am excited to be with them once more and to give myself a chance to be a better teacher. I am full of plans and I can't wait to try them when our schedule gets more predictable. It was as if, after a full semester, I am getting to know the kids all over again.
During my brief break, I realized that I lost my passion for teaching. I am feeling lazy because everything seems so familiar. I took my job for granted. It became so easy. It was all so familiar that I can do my job with my eyes closed. Now, I am looking at it in a new light. Because of this, ideas flowed in once more and it filled me with excitement. I have two more semesters and I know that I can make things happen.
I am back to my first year when I wanted to try different techniques and ideas to make school more fun for my students. I became so obsessed with academic development that I forgot to pay attention to the children's emotional and social needs. Now, my goal is to produce kids who are academically advanced and emotionally stable.
I'm back on track and with God to guide me - I know that I can be the teacher I want to be

Washing Hands

I feel like Pilate right now.

The kids are misbehaving and I know a big part is my fault. I am guilty of neglect and laziness. The kids can feel my lack of energy everyday and they respond by being overly active. They have been hurting each other in a helpless plea for my attention. I try to convince myself that I did my best in the classroom. That I tried different techniques - but I am not so sure about that.

Now, during the PTC, I tell parents about their kid's behavior. I tell them what I did to meet their needs. I was honest but I didn't feel that what I did was enough for what the kids need. It was as if I was washing my hands of the guilt. That I was denying my part in the misbehavior. I blamed it on the fact that they have been together for three years. I blamed it on the class size, the kids' ages. I forgot to blame me.

But at least it's not too late. I still have two quarters to make up for my shortcomings. I pray that God will grant me the passion that I need to deal with my kids.

My View on Jejemons and Jejemonism

Even before the term jejemon was coined, I am already irritated with people who type and text in ways that make simple words very complicated. I mean, it's even easier to spell english words to Filipino (e.g. call = kol) than to use complicated characters and numerals just to sound cool. And they even made their lives harder by alternating upper and lower case letters.

Lately, I have been seeing a lot of anti-Jejemon posts on the net. They were even featured on TV! I can't help but remember the times when the word "jologs" was gaining popularity. There are self-confessed jologs and anti-jologs. Now, we have jejemons and jejebusters. Funny but before, even jologs call other jologs - jologs! History seems to be repeating itself! Former jejemons are now having a change of heart, they are accusing their cohorts of being jejemons when they used to be one!

Anyway, being an educator, I am anti-jejemonism. I mean how can the young people of today develop their language skills with this trend! They can't spell words right and the grammar, my goodness! they should be sent back to preschool!

However, being a thirty-something, I say let them be. They are just kids wanting to be noticed. Surely, they will outgrow it. Five, ten, fifteen years from now- they will just laugh at themselves the way we laughed at ourselves when we used to go gaga over spraynet and boots with dresses.

Used

Sometimes, I hate being me.

I know that nobody is perfect and I don't expect myself to be. I know that I can't please everybody and sometimes, that is what brings me down.

When I do something I really want to do, I give it my best. Giving something without expecting anything in return is something I used to be good at. However, I am only human and sometimes it hurts to realize that nobody appreciates what you do for them. I hate myself for feeling like this because I have been struggling to learn how not to let anybody's opinion change the way I see myself. But now...

I am feeling like I have been used. I feel tired and worn out. I feel like I cannot do anything to find the love that I have been searching for.

I keep telling myself that I cannot change other people's opinion of me. I can only change my own perception. But no matter how I try, I just feel like this.

Well I guess, it's just another bout of PMS. Hopefully, I won't be like this in the next few days.

Kinse na Kami!

Kinakabahan ako kagabi. Akala ko, walang dadating. Paano naman, als-8 na ng gabi, mangilan-ngilan pa lang kami. Tahimik na kong nagdasal at sinabi sa sarili kong, kung mabigo man akong pagsama-samahin ang mga kaibigan ko, sana matanggap ko ito.

Pero makaraan ang ilang minuto, nagkita-kita nang muli ang mga magkakaibigan. Umingay na sa tawanan at kwentuhan ang lugar. Kabi-kabila na nag nag- "picture, picture" at napabuntung-hininga na lang ako dahil alam ko, magiging masaya ang gabing ito.

Sa gitna ng kasiyahan, tahimik kong minasdan ang mga kaklase ko. Ang bilis ng panahon! Lahat kami, lagpas trenta na. At habang tinititigan ko ang bawat isa sa kanila, naisip ko, akalain mo yun. Noon, para lang kaming mga tanga. Ngayon, mukha pa rin kaming tanga. hehehe

Lahat kami, marami nang pinagdaanan sa buhay. Pare-parehong nakipaglaban sa mga pagsubok. Nakaranas na kaming lahat ng kabiguan at maging ng tagumpay. Dahil pinili naming ipagpatuloy ang laban, bawat araw ay pakikipagsapalaran. Ang iba sa amin, may mga paghihirap na pinagdaraanan sa kasalukuyan, ang iba naman, marahil ay kuntento na sa kung anong meron sila. Pero ngayong gabi, kinalimutan muna namin kung sino kami ngayon. Parang pare-pareho kaming bumalik sa panahong wala kaming iniisip kundi kung paano papasa, paano mangongopya, paano tatakas sa klase, paano mapapansin ng crush, paano didiskarte sa nililigawan.

Ngayon ko lang na-realize, ang simple pala ng buhay noon. Pero bakit parang napakakomplikado na para sa amin. Noon, big deal lahat. Umiiyak na ang iba sa isang mababang grade (na kung tutuusin ay hindi naman bagsak). Nagwawala na ang iba sa pang-aasar ng mga kaibigan (e hindi naman yun repleksyon ng pagkatao nila). Ibayong paghihirap para sa marami kapag hindi napansin ng crush nila (hindi naman sila!). Totoo nga ang sabi, "youth is wasted on the young." Kung alam sana namin na simple lang ang buhay noon, sana mas madami kaming nagawang mas mabuti noon.

Pero matatanda na kami, marami na kaming natutunan sa buhay. Nakakatuwa na lang isipin ang nakaraan. Ang saya-saya ko kagabi. Ngayon pag naaalala ko, napapangiti pa rin ako. Yun nga lang, hindi ko pa rin maiwasang malungkot. Kasi mas masaya sana, kung nandito si Ted. Sayang.

Kaninang madaling araw, nilapitan ako ni Jong. Sabi nya, nalulungkot daw sya dahil kanina lang magkakasama kami tapos ngayon, hiwa-hiwalay na naman. Hindi ko sya masyadong maintindihan kanina, siguro dahil masakit na ang ulo ko sa kalasingan at antok. Pero ngayon, nakuha ko na.

Masaya ako dahil nagsama-sama kami. Parang magic ang bawat pagkikita, parang hindi maubos ang tawa at kwentuhan. Tapos, pagkalipas ng ilang oras, tapos na. Hindi mo alam kung kailan ulit, kung paano ulit. Gusto mo sana bukas ulit, pero alam mong hindi naman pwede.

Gusto ko man ang idea na buwan buwan magkikita kaming lahat, hindi na rin pwede. Lahat kami, may kanya-kanya nang buhay. Ang iba, may pamilyang dapat bigyan ng panahon. May iba naman, hindi makawala sa trabaho. Isa pa, ayoko rin naman na magkasawaan kami. Mas nakakatuwa at nakakasabik ang matagal na hindi pagkikita.

Sa ngayon, pahinga muna ko sa reunion. Nagbunga ang pagod na ginugol naming lahat. Pero, katawan ko ang sumusuko. Isa pa, gusto ko rin sana na sa susunod na pagkikita-kita namin, mas mabuting tao na ako.

getting low

I have been busy organizing our 15th year reunion and I am getting tired.
Getting tired of calling meetings in which nobody attends. Then I'll hear comments like they did not enjoy it and we are disorganized. dang!
Do they know how it's like to give some of your time and yet nobody appreciates even the effort?
Do they know how it's like to worry if you are doing the right thing or not?
I am not doing this for myself! I am doing this for all of us and still, they say nasty comments yet do not have enough guts to come up to me and tell me that I am doing a stupid job! I am giving them the power to decide. I am giving them the freedom to express their ideas. What is wrong with them?!

PMS

Lately, I've been so busy.
Busy with my job, busy with taking care of my family, busy organizing a reunion.
Lately, I have realized, that I have not taken time to get in touch with myself again.
The familiar feeling of not knowing what to do with my life is back. I have lost my goals, I have stopped dreaming. In the past, I can easily bounce back from this. two days is long enough but now, it's been going on for a few days now. I am sad.
I miss going out. I miss my friends. I miss Ted.
I miss my old self.
Why do I always feel this way when I have my period?

Infidelity and Regret

what I don't understand about married men is why they can't seem to be satisfied with their wives after they get married. why didn't they see that "something" missing while they were still in the boyfriend-girlfriend stage?

Then after they get caught, they will feel so sorry and beg their wives to take them back?!

See, they hurt, not only their wives, but their mistresses as well. Do they know how it feels like to be kept hanging and hoping that one day you'll be together? No! All they know is that they are having fun while their wives are faithfully waiting on them. They know that if they get caught or the other woman comes to her senses and leaves them - their wives would take them back.

I think, that if you decide to be unfaithful to your partner, you should own up to it.

don't look like a lost puppy when everyone leaves you. You have to be prepared to face the consequences and don't ever regret the choices you made!

or better yet. do not be unfaithful at all!

Corny, Boring, Plain Alive

From Monday to Friday, I wake up at around 6 a.m. and try to listen to the morning rush. Chico and Delamar are so funny, unfortunately, i have no radio on my cellphone so I can't listen to them everyday. Instead of bearing with the radio jocks of the stations most jeepneys listen to, I sleep. Everyday, I am late but I never forget to eat rice for breakfast. I start my class at 8 a.m.
At 11:30 a.m. I dismiss my class and turn on the radio to listen to the RORO show. I like Rico Robles' voice and Jude Rocha reminds me of someone. I have no interest in basketball except when I bet in the "ending." I react through twitter to their topics while I play Plants vs. Zombies. Then I'll check Farmville, Cafe World, and Pet Society in Facebook as I check newsletters and journals on the side. I'm not a multi-tasking queen but I can try if I really want to.
By 3:30, I make sure that I have worksheets for my tutees. I brush my teeth and prepare to leave by 4 and from 5 to 8 I tutor kids. I get home at around 9 p.m. so that I could sit in front of the TV and watch PBB. Oh! I forgot to mention that I am a Melason fan and sometimes I fight anonymous people in the net to defend Melai while I do the rest of the Facebook apps.

Everyday, this is my routine. I don't do anything new. I don't believe my friends even remember me. Before I sleep, I stay awake, thinking how corny and boring my existence is. I am not living. I am just plain alive.

Saturdays and Sundays are a bore as well.